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Brian

Boycotting Vs. Teaching Moments

A few years ago I was watching Sesame Street with my then 2 year old. We were watching one particular episode of "Elmo's World" where they were talking about family. They began to show pictures of what a family looked like. To my dismay, I saw a picture of two men and a little girl eating an ice cream. And Elmo stated, "this is a family."  I was shocked, angry, and amazed. I began to immediately think of what I could do to show Sesame Street that they were teaching the wrong message.
I hate to admit what I did from that point. I got online and begin calling organizations that I knew would get just as upset as I was and hopefully something would be done to pull this show off the air. Understand, Sesame Street has been on television for 40 years and has over 4,200 episodes that it has aired. But again, I thought we must take them down. I decided that my family would boycott Sesame Street. So for the next year we did not watch this "educational broadcast from the pits of hell." (Please read my sarcasm)
Well as time went on, I one day allowed my daughter to again watch Sesame Street, because just like with any good boycott, you should boycott until it is inconvenient for you right? As we were watching this program I began to think of what was my personal responsibility with my child. My number one priority is to teach my children the ways of the Lord, and not to just shield them from the evil. Please understand I am not at all saying that I should subject my girls to blatant sin and violence but I must teach them the things of God. So I began to teach my oldest daughter what a family consist of according to the Scriptures since that day.
Fast forward to today. I was getting dressed to go to the office and my two daughters were watching Sesame Street. When I heard Elmo's World come on and it happened to be the "Family Episode." The conversation that I heard from my 4 year old was an awesome thing.

She looked at her little sister and said, "Now Anna Kate, this show tells us that a boy and another boy can get married, or a girl and another girl can get married, but God teaches us that only a boy and a girl should get married."

It was one of the proudest moments I have had as a Dad! I saw that if we continue to teach our children the truths of God and the truths of the Scriptures, they will grow in that truth and they will share it with their children and their grandchildren. Seems like I have read that before somewhere...oh yeah Deuteronomy 6!

What kind of Teaching Moments have you had with your children? Let us hear about it!

What does Family Discipleship Look Like?

My good friend of mine and fellow student pastor Ryan Marcum (www.ryanmarcum.com) and I have been discussing creating a Family Discipleship Plan. He has some great ideas when it comes to how is family discipleship built. I was reading his blog this morning on Family Discipleship Action Steps - It is a great read that you can check out here. http://ryanmarcum.com/family-discipleship-action-steps/. We talked about one other step that I believe is important. I decided to write it up myself so the following is my addition to the action steps for a family discipleship plan. Let me know what you think. Comment below any other additions or subtractions that you feel are necessary.

Another important step in family dicipleship is to:

Seize God Sightings and Make Time for Spiritual Conversations – One thing that is important in family discipleship is to (1) ask for, (2) look for, and (3) seize “God sightings.”  I can’t think of a better way to discuss spiritual matters with your children than by sharing things of God that you see together. Let’s take a look at the three ways to do this:

1. “Ask for” – We must be in a state of constant prayer. In 1 Thessalonians 5:17 when Paul says, “never stop praying” (NLT) he is not giving us a rule to live by but reminding the church of Thesselonica that we as believers should always be in communication with God. I think as parents we must always ask God to show us ways we can share His love with our children.
2. “Look for” – As parents, we must seek the guide and counsel of the Holy Spirit. In Acts 16:6, Paul changed his plans and looked for what God wanted him to do as he traveled to Macedonia. In the same way, as we walk throughout our day with our children, we must constantly be in tune with the Spirit to show us these “God Sightings.
3. “Seize them” – Once we have asked for and looked for “God Sightings” we must take advantage of them. So many times we feel as parent’s maybe the time is not right, or we don’t know how to talk to our children about these moments. Allow the Spirit to guide your conversation and open up a spiritual dialogue between you and your child. Spiritual conversations can be awkward and uncomfortable at first, but as you and your child get used to talking about things that are of God, they will look forward to asking questions and hearing your views on spiritual matters. Remember it is okay to tell your child you do not know an answer that they ask. But make a commitment that you will seek an answer together as a family. In the end there may not be an answer to what they want to know. Explain to them that is okay. I have always said, “I don’t want to serve a God that I can explain 100%.” That makes Him too humanly. I enjoy the fact that there is some mystery to God that I will not know this side of heaven (and won’t care about once I am in heaven.)

This Ain't Your Daddy's Student Ministry

     What a great time it is to be involved in student ministry. Over the last several years, God has been stirring my heart and I have felt like there must be more to student ministry than what we were doing. For far too long, student ministry has consisted of planning activities and camps, having 5th quarters and eating school lunches, putting on spectacular Wednesday night services and hoping that small group leaders were doing what they were expected to do. I have felt like there must be more to what God had called me to. I have a passion for penetrating the home with the Gospel of Christ. I was even a victim of lying to parents and telling them that I wanted to help them disciple their child, and in doing so I would have activities planned at the church almost every night.

     My thoughts began to change when I had my first child. I began to see that my number one priority was to disciple my own little girl. I felt that if I were truly doing that, then maybe I would be an example to other parents and they would disciple their children. But then as she got older and my second daughter was born, I realized how difficult it was to disciple without support, and how little support there was out there. I realized that I was falling into the trap of trying to "programize" discipleship with my girls, I'm a student pastor, programming is what we do best! But it is not the most effective method! (Thank you "Simple Church!")

     About four years ago I went to a student pastors conference that was hosted by my mentor, Larry Lawrence at FBC Jonesboro, Ga. In this conference Steve Wright talked about his new book, "Rethink." As he talked everything began to fall into place for me. There was one fact that Steve said that shook the framework that I had built my ministry. I am not sure why it had never occurred to me. The average Christian Student who is highly engaged in student ministry will spend on average 3-4 hours a week doing "ministry related activities." That leaves approximately 53 awake hours a week to spend with family. There is no way we, as student pastors, can effectively disciple students when we just see them 7% of the week. So since that conference I have been on mission to figure out from Scripture how I can minister to students the way that God has called me to.

   This brings me to my excitement. Family ministry seems to be catching on throughout the student ministry circles. I have read more books, blogs, and articles about how we can teach and resource parents to disciple their children. Most importantly, as I have began a new ministry, I have had parents asking for help on how to disciple their own children! It seems as if daily someone has new has ideas on how to reach the families of students.

     The future of Student Ministry is bright! The days ahead are exciting! I honestly look forward to seeing what student ministry will look like in 5 years! Good news! This ain't your daddy's youth ministry! It is so much better!

Why Parent Ministry Is So Important to Me

Today I set aside some time to read. I have been reading for the past 4 years only what I have been told to read by professors. Since that chapter is coming to a close I now can read what I want. I came across a "Top Ten" list by Dr. Richard Ross from SWBTS. He presented this at a conference at NOBTS last year. After reading it, I was reminded of why I am so passionate about Family Ministry. Feel free to pass this along. You can also learn more about Dr. Ross at www.richardaross.com

Top 10 Things I've Learned

Ministering to Parents

Dr. Richard Ross,

Professor of Student Ministry

Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary

1. Almost every church has a student ministry that is church-centered,
family supported – rather than family-centered, church supported (even
though it isn’t biblical).

2. The great majority of student ministers believe Scripture calls for
parents to be the most important spiritual leaders to their own
teenagers – but they give most of their time, giftedness, and budget to
making their program first in spiritual leadership.

3. At least half of Christian parents do not know the basics of parenting
teenagers and therefore make mistakes that impact relationships and
spiritual development. (But most churches have done little or nothing to
help them).

4. Emotional injuries account for the majority of relationship problems in
Christian families. Few parents or teenagers ever ask, “Is there a way I
have hurt you but never have made right?” (And few churches ever
create teaching and environments where such conversations are likely
to happen).

5. Whether they are conscious of it or not, most Christian parents would
rather see their teenager win state in some athletic, artistic, or
academic competition – than to see that teenager visibly join Christ in
bringing His kingdom to their school campus. (But most churches have
not led parents toward spiritual transformation that changes priorities).

6. The majority of Christian parents have forgotten that a heart connection
– a warm and close relationship – is the pipeline or conduit that carries
spiritual impact from them to their teenager. (They tend to believe just
managing young lives will lead to positive outcomes).

7. Parents have allowed their teenagers to so multiply extracurriculars that
those extracurriculars now harm students rather than build students
(because they harm families rather than build families).

8. Student ministers, parents, and teenagers have underestimated the
value of intergenerational ministry events – primarily because they have
never seen them done well. (Planning with core parents and students
offers the best hope for building excitement. High-quality programming
that everyone enjoys and profits from offers the best hope for sustaining
excitement).

9. Spiritually alive youth families offers our best hope for reaching and
caring for teenagers from spiritually lost homes. (Only poorly designed
parent and family ministry excludes solo youth).

10. The student ministry train is pulling out and will leave some
student ministers standing back at the station. Student ministers who
will be valuable for the future quickly will re-tool – to become prophetic
in calling and equipping parents to become the primary spiritual leaders,
to become competent in providing programming to train and support
parents, and to become effective in planning and leading
intergenerational youth ministry events.

God vs. Satan??

Tonight I was flipping channels and I noticed on the History channel a program coming on called God vs. Satan. According to the description, it was a look at the end times from three different religions. This title got me thinking. I think a common misconception is that Satan is the arch enemy of God. This is the farthest thing from the truth. Now before you call me a heretic listen to my thought. As I type this I realize I know absolutely nothing about Marvel comics. But Google to the rescue! I looked up arch-enemies and here are a few:

Superman - Lex Luthor
Batman - The Joker
Spider-Man - Green Goblin
Green Lantern - Sinestro
Aquaman - Black Manta
X-Men - The Brotherhood
Hulk - The Leader
Iron Man - The Mandarin

Each Arch Enemy has a power that is a source of weakness to the Super Hero. I think we forget that Satan has no power over Christ...so if we are believers then Satan has NO POWER over us.
God is the woner and creator of all power. God is Omnipotent. Genesis 18:14 reminds us that there is nothing impossible for God.

Personally I think we give Satan way too much credit.

Be Quiet

This is an email devotional I receieve through HomeWord. I really enjoyed it and thought that I would share it. The question is are you and I brave enough to try it? Can I "unplug." I am challenged by these thoughts!

Shhhh...

By Leslie Snyder

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.
Jeremiah 1:5

I’m convinced that children intuitively know God. They aren’t afraid to talk with Him, about Him, or tell you stories that include Him. There is a place in their heart that is open to all things spiritual. I have experienced this in our own family and in others. One very intimate example was given by an author who shared, “A four-year-old girl was overheard whispering into her baby brother’s ear, “‘Baby,” she whispers, “tell me what God sounds like. I am starting to forget.”1

Seeking God requires listening, and listening is hard work. It takes energy, patience, time, effort, and most of all, silence. And, while most of us are okay with the energy, patience, time and effort piece, we shudder at the thought of being silent and quickly find ways of filling the widening void.

In silence, the hurts, pains, rejections and failures we have pushed away come rushing back. In silence, the voices of those who have authority over us can seem to overpower us. In silence, worry and fear linger strangely near us. But consider the paradox offered by Mother Teresa, “God is the friend of silence.” Elijah learned this while hiding away in a cave. Expecting God to show Himself in loud and magnificent ways, Elijah was offered instead the still, small whisper of God. Psalm 46:10 reads, “Be still and know that I am God.” The truth is, things are born in quiet that cannot be heard in the din of our overly verbal days.2

Consider your day. Is it full of noise? Do radio, TV, Internet, iPods and other fillers clutter your mind with excess noise? Even good things can become clutter if they distract us from times of quiet.

Today, I challenge you to “unplug. Leave the cell phone and iPod at home and take a walk. Resist the temptation to speak. Walk in silence and ask God to speak to you. Become aware of the small joys you may have forgotten, like the sound of children playing in the distance, the sound of a bird or squirrel chattering in a tree, or even listen to your own heartbeat.

Silence can be deafening. It can be threatening or even terrifying. But it can also be healing, purifying, life-giving and restorative.